Cohen urges graduates to rethink their definition of success

To the engineers and architects, social workers and business consultants, artists and scientists of the WashU Class of 2026, Emmy Award winner Andy Cohen offered up a band of unlikely role models: the stars of “The Real Housewives.”

“I’ve learned a lot about success from ‘The Real Housewives.’ And you can too,” Cohen told graduates. “The housewives can get scrappy, but their ability to forgive is regenerative and a lesson for us all. Success for a real housewife is learning how to laugh at yourself and own when you’re wrong. Lean into it, and you stay in control.”

A gleeful Cohen spoke before some 3,400 graduates and their families and friends at the university’s 165th Commencement May 15 at historic Francis Olympic Field. The ceremony included remarks by Chancellor Andrew D. Martin and Board of Trustees Chair Andrew Bursky, whose family foundation recently made a historic $200 million commitment to WashU’s public health school, now named the Andrew M. and Jane M. Bursky School of Public Health.

“This university is 173 years old. It was here long before any of us and it will be here long after all of us — but only because, in every generation, the people who received their diplomas on days like today decided it was worth keeping,” Bursky said. “It does not belong to the trustees or the faculty or the people whose names end up on the buildings. Starting today, it belongs to you.”

The ceremony also featured speeches by undergraduate speaker Mason Shaver and graduate student speaker Sejal Popat as well as the presentation of honorary degrees to Cohen; Kwofe Coleman, president and CEO of the Municipal Theatre Association of St. Louis (The Muny); Deborah E. Lipstadt, retired ambassador and the University Distinguished Professor at Emory University; Michael McDonald, five-time Grammy Award-winning musician and lead vocalist for the Doobie Brothers; Anabeth C. Weil, philanthropist and former Forest Park executive; and John D. Weil, investor, philanthropist and emeritus trustee.

The latest in a string of celebrity Commencement speakers, Clayton, Mo., native Cohen reflected on his journey from nearby Wydown Middle School to Bravo’s Manhattan studios, where he hosts the biggest names in entertainment, politics and pop culture on his show, “Watch What Happens Live,” and serves as executive producer of “The Real Housewives” franchise, which boasts 32 installments worldwide (“Don’t sleep on ‘The Real Housewives of Rhode Island,’ people,” Cohen cracked.) The speech was funny, self-effacing and written by the man himself.

“AI had nothing to do with any of this. As it turns out, our brains work just fine,” Cohen proclaimed to applause.

Cohen shared that he comes from a long line of WashU alumni, including grandmother Ruth Sachs, who graduated nearly a century ago; uncles Stanley Allen and Robert Cohen; his mother, Evelyn Cohen; and sister Emily Rosenfeld. Andy Cohen, however, studied at Boston University.

“You’re probably thinking, What happened to you, Andy? Was I too dumb to get into WashU? Perhaps I was. Was my mother’s greatest fear about me at that time that I would ‘grow up to be an airhead?’ Yes! It was,” Cohen joked. “But today, this airhead is walking away with an honorary degree from a university referred to as the ‘Harvard of the Midwest.’ And ranked as number one in best college dorms by Niche.com!”

Growing up, Cohen aspired to work on camera and was thrilled when CBS News hired him as a production assistant in New York. The hours were long and the work was hard, but Cohen had a blast.

Graduates stop for photos at the Olympic rings outside of Francis Olympic Field. The post-Commencement festival featured music and food from St. Louis’ favorite eateries. (Photo: Robert Cohen/WashU)

“Creatively stimulated, working in a medium I loved. I wasn’t getting any sleep. But nobody moves to New York to sleep,” Cohen recalled. “I was happy, though. And happiness is success. It is invaluable. I knew a lot of people who were making a lot more money than me, but none who were having half the fun that I was.”

A decade later, Cohen landed at Bravo, where he helped launch a dynamic slate of unscripted series and specials, including hits such as “Top Chef,” “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” and “Project Runway.” He has since earned 15 Emmy nominations, published five New York Times bestsellers and garnered millions of fans. But that’s not what makes him a success, Cohen told the crowd.

“Success is the thing you all graduate wanting. And today I want you to redefine what that means. Take a little of the pressure off yourselves and broaden your scope of what success is,” Cohen said. “Success from today forward will instead come from knowing who you are, who your friends are and following your dreams.”

To get there, Cohen urged students to build a strong community. In what seemed a curious tangent, Cohen then recounted how a shared preference for boxer shorts served as the foundation for a lifelong friendship between him and his BU roommate.

“I tell this story because that roommate has remained like a brother to me, and today his daughter is out there graduating with you all. I love a full-circle moment,” Cohen said. “Success is building a community and keeping that community close. … This will come to benefit you, and sometimes the most random people will reappear in your lives in magical ways.”

Cohen also encouraged students to “be nosy” in work and in life.

“There was not a door at that CBS broadcast center that I didn’t open, just to see what was inside. There was not a question I didn’t ask,” Cohen said. “I challenge you to be nosy — now more than ever. Be nosy about figuring out what’s true. Think independently and don’t allow yourself to be gaslit by people telling you one thing when you can plainly see through it.”

Other words of wisdom: say yes (“Success is taking opportunities offered to you”); say no (“Saying no gives you power over your destiny to stay out of situations you don’t want to be in”); and prioritize oral health (“Nobody forgets someone with bad breath. It’s a stink you cannot shake!”).

Cohen offered one other bit of memorable advice that fans of his shows already know well.

“The ‘Real Housewives’ are brilliant at finding a look that works for them and sticking with it,” Cohen said. “Get your look and your glam right, graduates, and you will go far. Yes, I said that: Get your glam right, WashU.”